2008 Woodie Awards
Pillow Talk:
Polyamory: A build-your-own-love kit
Glory Fink
Issue date: 3/8/07 Section: Opinion
This view is similar to money in your wallet. You only have so much money, and you can't give more than a specific amount. But love is not analogous to money. Any mother with several children will tell you she didn't have to divide her love between her children, but rather as her family grew so did her supply of love she had to give. Polyamory contends romantic love is similar and the heart, mind and soul can adequately love more than one person at a time.
"Let's say all your life, for breakfast, you're eating from a Kellogg's variety pack. And then you don't get the variety pack. You pick one. Your favorite one. And you just get that one from then on. Every day, for the rest of your life, the same cereal. And then you wake up one morning, and you're just not hungry anymore," said the character Ed in the movie "City Slickers"
Well Ed, polyamory says you don't have to buy just one cereal for the rest of your life. You can even buy the full-size boxes of your favorite cereals and keep them in the house together. No longer will the box of Fruit Loops wonder if you're secretly buying boxes of Apple Jacks on the side. Now, Fruit Loops and Apple Jacks can live in harmony in the same kitchen secure in the knowledge of your love. But how will they react when you explain that you recently realized your love for Honey Smacks, also?
Polyamory isn't for everyone. Some people simply need to feel like a one-and-only to someone else. But monogamy isn't for everyone either. Sharing your life and love with more than one person at a time is possible, but go slow and make sure in your heart of hearts that this is right for you and your loved ones. If you are not true to your self in a relationship then it is not a true relationship.
Links and literature suggestions about polyamory can be found at AskGlory.Com. Your feedback and article ideas are always appreciated. Email us at printz@usm.edu or Glory directly at glory@askglory.com.
"Let's say all your life, for breakfast, you're eating from a Kellogg's variety pack. And then you don't get the variety pack. You pick one. Your favorite one. And you just get that one from then on. Every day, for the rest of your life, the same cereal. And then you wake up one morning, and you're just not hungry anymore," said the character Ed in the movie "City Slickers"
Well Ed, polyamory says you don't have to buy just one cereal for the rest of your life. You can even buy the full-size boxes of your favorite cereals and keep them in the house together. No longer will the box of Fruit Loops wonder if you're secretly buying boxes of Apple Jacks on the side. Now, Fruit Loops and Apple Jacks can live in harmony in the same kitchen secure in the knowledge of your love. But how will they react when you explain that you recently realized your love for Honey Smacks, also?
Polyamory isn't for everyone. Some people simply need to feel like a one-and-only to someone else. But monogamy isn't for everyone either. Sharing your life and love with more than one person at a time is possible, but go slow and make sure in your heart of hearts that this is right for you and your loved ones. If you are not true to your self in a relationship then it is not a true relationship.
Links and literature suggestions about polyamory can be found at AskGlory.Com. Your feedback and article ideas are always appreciated. Email us at printz@usm.edu or Glory directly at glory@askglory.com.
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Viewing Comments 1 - 4 of 4
Polygeezer
Ken HASLAM
posted 3/08/07 @ 7:06 AM EST
Glory, I have been a Polyamory activist for some 8 years and I want to complement you on your article on Polyamory for the Student Prinz. Fair and accurate. (Continued…)
Susan
posted 3/08/07 @ 9:42 PM EST
I'm very glad to know I'm not a freak for wanting to have a relationship with my fiance and my girlfriend that I truely love. It seems sometimes like we're the only three people in the world that understand I love them both equally. (Continued…)
AG friend
posted 3/12/07 @ 1:31 AM EST
Ken Haslam,
If you'd like an "AskGlory.com" T-shirt send her an email with your size and address for her to send it to.
I have to be honest I loved the cereal comment also. (Continued…)
Chris in Knoxville
posted 3/15/07 @ 10:29 AM EST
Great article. The psychology of relationships in this country is growing and adapting just as fast as technology. While it is a shock to many who believe in monogomy, many have begun to wonder, if monogomy is the end-all/be-all why are so many people getting divorced or even worse, why are so many people living out their lives miserable with the person they are with but stuborn in the "love once, married once" mentality. (Continued…)
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