I don’t know why everyone is freaking about the whole “selfie” craze. I mean, I could understand why you would freak out about the word “selfie” being added to the Associated Press stylebook – because yes, that did happen – but this has been a thing for a long time now.
Most college students take selfies literally every day. I constantly get selfie Snapchats and see selfie Instagram photos. I mean, let’s be honest, I’m guilty of this trend.
I think the only thing people are hyped up about is the fact that we now have a name for it. Instead of saying, “I’m taking a picture,” we now say, “I’m taking a selfie.”
And that’s the thing: we take selfies for literally everything. #beachselfie, #roadtripselfie, #selfie-cause-I-can, #selfie-cause-I’m-bored. We take selfies because we look really awesome and then we turn around and take selfies to show how tragic we are.
I am all for selfies. But, I think there are a few rules we should all follow when taking and posting them.
- Rule #1 – Don’t post too many selfies in a day. I mean, really one should be the limit unless you’re doing something really cool like meeting President Barack Obama or Ellen DeGeneres.
- Rule #2 – #selfie-cause-I-can and #selfie-cause-I’m-bored-are-just-annoying. Don’t just take a selfie to take a selfie. Make it have some sort of meaning.
- Rule #3 – If you take a selfie every day, during the same time, then bye. We don’t need to see your #workselfie, #lunchselfie or #classselfie every single freaking day.
- Rule #4 – Have a little self-pride and dignity. Don’t post your #drunkselfie everywhere or send it to your friends list on Snapchat. Just send it to the few friends who will laugh about it.
- Rule #5 – Don’t put your life story, song lyrics or a deep quote on your selfie. Just no. Like, a picture of you in the car should not have, “broken up deep inside, but you won’t get to see the tears I’ve cried, behind these hazel eyes,” or, “letting go isn’t the end of the world, it’s the beginning of a new life.” I just cringed thinking about it.
- Rule #6 – It’s always okay to take a selfie when something with your appearance changes (i.e. haircut, nose ring, etc.) or if it’s an important event or holiday (Christmas day, first day of school, Miley Cyrus concert, snow day or when Connie Cones opens, etc.)
Oh, and now we have a song for it. And don’t even pretend like that song isn’t at least half of you when you’re at Brewsky’s or DeRe on a Thursday night.
I’ll spare everyone the lyrics, but there are some directly related to selfies that need to be addressed. So here they are, with my commentary.
“Let me take a selfie.”
(And by a selfie, you mean like 15 and then you’ll debate about which one looks the best and ask for help a million times.)
“Can you guys help me pick a filter?”
(*sigh* told you)
“I don’t know if I should go with XX-Pro or Valencia. I wanna look tan.”
(Then go with X-Pro II – Valencia doesn’t make you look tan)
“What should my caption be?
I want it to be clever.”
(Do not. I repeat – DO NOT put something you think is clever.)
“How about livin’ with my b-tches, Hashtag LIVE?”
(Hahahahahahhahahahaha. Oh wait, you were serious?)
“I only got 10 likes in the last five minutes. Do you think I should take it down?”
(That’s two likes a minute. Calm down, yo!)
“Let me take another selfie.”
“Wait, pause. Jason just liked my selfie. What a creep.”
(Why is he creepy? You put it up, probably in hopes he’d see it and like it)
“I guess I took a good selfie.”
Don’t be that annoying person who only takes selfies to get likes and followers or to get an ex to see it just so he or she will text you.
Other than that, my advice is to keep calm and #selfie on.